1/10/2010

A Few More Days Of Hell

So I'm starting to adapt to my life as a temporary invalid. (Above is my foot in happier times this past summer on the farm.) My couch is my true domain for the time being. Mike is actually being a surprisingly good nurse. He is not the most patient man under most conditions but he is doing whatever needs to be done to get us through this situation. I am trying to stay positive but I had my first major meltdown this afternoon. I'd had a particularly rough bathroom trip, (I will spare you all the gory details). I lost it and started crying from the pain and the complete loss of dignity. Mike held my hand and comforted me for almost an hour.

I've only taken a few Vicodin today, only when I really needed them. I'm not at all crazy about how they make me feel so I really don't foresee a problem with getting off of them. It's like I'm fighting my way through cotton for the first few hours after I take one now. I can't form a coherent thought and I'm just in slow motion. It doesn't really put me to sleep either just a kind of hazy place. It does dull the pain, I just wish it didn't do the same to my brain.

We go to the orthopedic doctor tomorrow at 1 pm. Mike is going into work for the fist few hours and will then come home. I'm seriously dreading the transport process as much as what he might have to say to me. I have terrible upper body strength and pulling myself up and/or using crutches right now seems like an impossibility. Once I have a real cast on the ankle I'm hoping I will have more stability and confidence. Right now it has a splint and ace bandages wrapped around it. If I go down or put any accidental weight on it I could do some more damage. I do think the swelling has gone down so I hope he'll be able to tell me if I need surgery or not.

I have a friend who is a surgical nurse and she told me to try to avoid surgery if at all possible. I certainly will but if he says it is the only way for it to heal properly that is what I will have to do. If he seems at all uncertain I will probably go for a second opinion. I've had at least 4 people tell me the name of a good ortho Dr. so we shall see.

Some friends came over tonight and we watched the game and ate pizza. It was nice to have a bit of normalcy. She brought me a gift basket complete with yarn and stationary. This super sweet couple is planning their September wedding and so I offered to do some research for her on vendors and other wedding ideas. It will be something productive to do with my laptop as I recover. As I get a clearer head I will hopefully find some other ways to spend the weeks I will be off work doing something for the business. We shall see...

9 comments:

Hot Rocks said...

Oh dear...I just finished reading about your accident. I hope you are feeling a bit better today. I am sending wishes to you for a speedy recovery!

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear about this. At least you have a good nurse at home ;)

brokenteepee said...

Paige,
I live in pain. My I offer the suggestion that you look into some guided imagery. It is not a perfect solution but with practice it does help. The vicodin will help but they do fog your brain as you say. Pain is not good for you - it stresses your system. Sometimes sleep is the best defense. It's what I do when I am at my worst. You might think you won't be able to, but you can train yourself to...

If you want to write...kaiminani@gmail.com

Karen said...

I hope you feel better each day. Hang in there and remember that each day will get better as you heal. Hugs for you.

Anonymous said...

Wow...just read this and the story below. I'm so sorry to hear you are in such horrible pain! I can only imagine how horrible it must be to feel so badly. I will be thinking about you and wishing you well. Hopefully it doesn't come down to surgery, but more importantly, hopefully you heal quickly!

At least you aren't stuck on the couch with nothing to do for that long. I mean, I know it's no picnic. But at least you can still feel productive anyway.

Ann said...

glad to hear Mike is taking good care of you. It helps to have someone supportive around. good luck at the doctors

Sinclair said...

Vicodin makes me nauseated and fuzzy. I am sorry to hear that you are still without a cast and firmly on the road to recovery, but I do hope you will be able to avoid surgery. Hang in there!

Duni said...

Paige - how are you feeling today? I hope the doctor had some reassuring news for you?

Laurie said...

You poor thing, I'm so sorry this happened to you! I've fallen on the ice several times and it's so easy to do. I hope you don't need surgery! You're in my prayers!

 

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